Bangkok Business Connections
The Best Networking Luncheon in Bangkok!
Thursday 8/September/11
Join
us for the best networking luncheon in Bangkok on 8/September/11 at the Foreign
Correspondent Club of Thailand, www.fccthai.com, Maneeya Building,
BTS Chidlom. The BBC is different because it is a proactive way
to network with other businesses. Instead of the usual one to
one networking style in a social setting or speed-networking,
the format is one to group. BBC is appropriate for business owners,
sales and marketing professionals. The meeting is 2 hours and
conducted during lunch time and includes a meal. The meeting is
open to the public.
The fee is 500 baht for BNOW members and 700 baht for non-members
including lunch (3 choices). Early bird offer, book and prepay
for your seat and get a 10% discount on event fee. Non-member
special, book and prepay for two seats pay membership price. E-mail
us now to find out how to take advantage of the offer, bnow@bnow.org.
Part-Time Maid Available Sukhumvit Area (Ekamai/Thonglor)
Our part-time maid, Khun On, is looking for another
part-time job as a maid. She would like a house or apartment around
the Sukhumvit area. She is available Mon, Wed and Sat in the afternoon.
She's able to speak a little English, can cook, clean, iron and
can help mind a toddler. If you or someone you know is looking for
a maid, have them ring her at 089 058 3494. If you'd like to speak
with me about her work, please call me 081 332 2524.
12 Best Excuses Ever
by Nury Vittachi
Late with an assignment? No problem. Try one of these lines.
ZAP! A mysterious lightning bolt struck many members of a North Korean sports team, leaving no visible marks but wiping out their skills. That’s how coach Kim Kwang Min explained his team’s failure in a women’s soccer tournament recently.
Mr Kim wins a place in our World’s Wackiest Excuses list.
He comes from a country famed for creative factoids.
Premier Kim Jong-Il picked up a golf club for the first time in 1994, his biography says. He shot a 38-under-par round including 11 holes-in-one. Then he gave up golf!
Why can’t I do things like that? The only time I tried golf, I couldn’t hit the ball, let alone send it in any particular direction.
Remember the football World Cup last year? North Korean coach Kim Jong Hun said he was getting tips from Kim Jong-Il through “an invisible cell phone” invented by the Dear Leader himself. (In 2004, the Dear Leader invented the burger.)
Click here for more.

Super Granny
An elderly lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her car. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at them at the top of her voice, "I have a gun and I know how to use it!
Get out of the car you dirty rotten scoundrels!"
The four men didn't wait for a second invitation but got out and ran like mad, whereupon the lady, somewhat shaken, proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the driver's seat.
She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition. She tried and tried and then it dawned on her why. A few minutes later she found her own car parked four or five spaces farther down. She loaded her bags into her car and drove to the police station.
The sergeant to whom she told the story nearly tore himself in two with laughter and pointed to the other end of the counter, where four pale white males were reporting a car jacking by a mad elderly woman described as white, less than 5' tall, glasses, and curly white hair carrying a large handgun.
No charges were filed.
(True story!)

To commemorate her 70th birthday , actress/vocalist, Julie Andrews made a special appearance at Manhattann bsp's Radio City Music Hall for the benefit of the AARP. One of the musical numbers she performed was 'My Favourite Things' from the legendary movie 'Sound Of Music'. Here are the lyrics she used: (Sing It!) - If you sin
g it, its especially hysterical!!!
Botox and nose drops and needles for knitting, Walkers and handrails and new dental fittings, Bundles of magazines tied up in string, These are a few of my favourite things.
Cadillacs and cataracts, hearing aids and glasses,Polident and Fixodent and false teeth in glasses, Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with swings, These are a few of my favourite things.
When the pipes leak, When the bones creak, When the knees go bad,
I simply remember my favourite things, And then I don't feel so bad.
Hot tea and crumpets and corn pads for bunions, No spicy hot food or food cooked with onions, Bathrobes and heating pads and hot meals they bring, These are a few of my favourite things...
Back pain, confused brains and no need for sinnin', Thin bones and fractures and hair that is thinnin', And we won't mention our short shrunken frames, When we remember our favourite things.
When the joints ache, When the hips break,
When the eyes grow dim,
Then I remember the great life I've had,
And then I don't feel so bad.
(Ms. Andrews received a standing ovation from the crowd that lasted over four minutes and repeated encores. Please share Ms. Andrews' clever wit and humour with others who would appreciate it)
Hillary in Heaven
Hillary Clinton died and went to heaven. As she stood in front of Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates, she saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. She asked, "What are all those clocks?"
Saint Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock.
Every time you lie, the hands on your clock will move.
"Oh," said Hillary, "whose clock is that?"
"That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved indicating that she never told a lie."
"Whose clock is that?"
"That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have only moved twice telling us that Abe only told 2 lies in his entire life."
"Where's Bill's clock?" Hillary asked.
"Bill's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan."

Bangkok Breast Cancer Support Group, a part of the Queen Sirikit Centre for Breast Cancer, Chulalongkorn Memorial Hospital offers monthly group meetings for breast cancer survivors. The meetings provide the opportunity for all to share with others their own experiences in treatment and recovery in a kind, caring and confidential environment.
The meetings are held on the first Wednesday of every month from 10.00 AM. -12.00 PM at the Olive Restaurant, next to Villa Supermarket between Sukhumvit 33 & 35. Parking is available.
Reservations are not required but it is helpful to know how many will be attending. Walk-ins are also very welcome.
We thank the Olive Restaurant who support our group for providing the space for this meeting. We look forward to welcome new members. We hope that this new time will accommodate everyone’s schedule.
Amongst the splendour of Bangkok, the streets are filled with stray cats and dogs, which go largely unnoticed and ignored. Many of them live a hard and miserable life in this concrete jungle; many more die from disease, injuries or at the hands of people. We at SCAD are committed to ensuring that some of these homeless cats and dogs have a chance at a better life. The ones at SCAD are the lucky ones that have been saved from a life on the streets through our “catch and release” program.
Please choose to OPT TO ADOPT TODAY and give one of these cats or dogs a chance at finding their forever home.
For more information contact Lindsay at SCAD today
Email: adoptions@scadbangkok.org Phone: 084 535 1452